Love & Loss

For every good thing in life, there’s an opposite. We wouldn’t truly know love if it wasn’t for loss, because whens something is taken from us – the love we felt seems to be ripped from inside of us. We know joy by experiencing sadness. We search for peace by experiencing some of life’s storms. For EJ and Alexis, they felt some of their deepest pain as a couple on their 5 year anniversary of marriage.

The lantern in the sky in the photos below is in memory of that loss. Through it, they learned to trust in God and love each other deeper as they traveled through this part of their journey together.

This is their story …

This feature was published in The White Wren Volume 3 – pick up your print copy here! 

What’s your favorite family pastime?

We both laugh every time someone asks us this question. We are both are very busy and typically juggling a lot of things at once. Therefore, our favorite pastime is probably napping. There is nothing better than getting some good takeout and taking a nap! But we enjoy adventuring  thru Tampa with our golden doodle name Winston and finding great spots to eat. We love just slowing time down and enjoying the small things.

Any lessons you learned as a family through the last year?

Our family experienced two miscarriages last year, one in October and the other in December. We wanted to wait until a certain time to have children because we wanted to be more established and prepared. Suffering a loss so deep was new to our family. We have been so blessed, and this was our first deep wound as a couple. One thing we learned is that, we (as a unit) have to truly trust in the Lord with all of our heart and lean on His understanding. We’ve always done this as individuals, but during this season we had to do it as a unit, a family. We both supported and encouraged each other as we mourned and processed the loss of babies.

Tell us a fun or silly story that happened to your family!

My husband and I bickered tremendously about getting our first family dog for almost four years, until I put a deposit down without his consent and purchased Winston. I definitely wouldn’t suggest that couples do this! Please don’t model after me, but can I tell you that Winston and my husband have the deepest love I’ve ever seen a man and dog have? Winston follows my husband around the house all day and sits at the window while he’s gone. I’m always pining for Winston’s love but my husband is his absolute favorite person. I always tease him when he’s buying expensive dog treats or snuggling Winston in bed and say “Hey,  remember when you didn’t want a dog?”. We just laugh together.

What does family mean to you?

Family are the people that show up, pray for you and encourage you. During our loss, we had people who were not blood related show up in our time of devastation and be there for us. Our own families are very supportive and always present no matter the distance. There have been times where people have disagreed with our marriage due to our ethnicities, but family will always be there for you.

This feature was published in The White Wren Volume 3 – pick up your print copy here! 

Photography: Ariel Rose Photography

Publisher at The White Wren

Publisher at The White Wren and Bajan Wed, Award Winning Photography + Videographer at Live View Studios, Dad, 80s music lover, crunchy health advocate

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